How to Politely Ask a Stranger to Give Up Their Seat on Public Transport for an Older Person or Pregnant Woman

Asking a stranger for their seat on public transport can be a delicate task. However, with a gentle and considerate approach, it's possible to make others aware of the need for them to stand.

Understanding the Situation

There are times when it's clear that a seat needs to be offered, such as when someone is visibly elderly, pregnant, or possibly injured. Other times, the need may not be as obvious. When approaching a stranger, it's important to inform them of the situation in a polite manner, allowing them to decide for themselves.

Observing the Situation

Some passengers may have already noticed and will willingly offer their seat. In these cases, publicly thanking them in a polite way can inspire others to follow their lead. However, if a seat is not offered voluntarily, it's essential to understand the limits of your request. While it's important to be considerate, there's also a time to recognize that not everyone will rise to the occasion.

Addressing Situations with Younger Individuals

For cases involving young people, it's crucial to tailor the approach. A 12- or 13-year-old might be too self-centered to consider someone else's needs. However, if their parents have taught them to be more empathetic, they might be more likely to help. Making the young person aware of the situation and showing that adult passengers also need help can sometimes lead to a more considerate response. For instance, a young teenager might not consider the possibility of an adult needing assistance. Pointing this out to them can prompt a more caring response.

Techniques for Making the Request

When you decide to ask for a seat, here are some techniques that can be tried:

Adapt your request to the age and social status of the person. A gentleman or lady, for example, may not need to be asked directly. An adult who has children might be more inclined to offer a seat if their kids previously helped others in similar situations. Choose a time when the person is likely to notice the need. During a particularly long journey or if the need is more urgent, a gentle and polite request might be more effective. Be specific about the situation. Mention the physical need, such as age, pregnancy, or injury, to make the request more clear and compelling. Offer to give back later if it would be convenient for the person. This can sometimes be reciprocated during a return journey or another opportunity.

Conclusion

While it's important to be considerate of others, it's also important to recognize that every situation is unique. Some strangers may be perfectly willing to help, while others might not. If a polite request is not met, it's important to respect their decision and recognize that you cannot force someone to be decent. However, making the request may still prompt a helpful response, especially in younger individuals who can be taught through example.